That was the phrase that bounced around in my head while Richard and I waited for someone to show up…five minutes, then ten, fifteen, twenty minutes…
Ugh! It’s just not that easy to do these sort of things, trying my hand at selling stuff on craigslist. So yes, Richard drove us the 65-miles one way for this small event to take place and it didn’t happen.
We did have someone come up to our vehicle and ask if we’re the person or persons he was to meet…who had the gun! OMG! Um, no, that’s not us! WOW!! After that, and having waited a full 30 minutes, we decided to leave.
I could just feel the little energy I did have leave my person. Great. Just great. And we had a long drive back home. Initially I had planned a little more shopping, but at this point, we both needed home.
We made the return drive fine, Richard had me drive some of it because he was so tired. It’s not bad driving, it’s a lot of scanning left and right looking for deer that might just decide to implant themselves into your oncoming vehicle!
When we got home I told Richard I now understood that phrase I’d heard Pema Chodron say about being grateful to everyone. I said in cases like this it’s not about the other person not showing up, it’s about my reaction to it, and what it teaches me about myself. Wow, that was a huge A-ha moment.
I had to think about this a lot…because everyday life pretty much knocks the stuffing out of me, I had to ask myself if I was using that to justify feeling anger, resentment, disappointment?
I also mentioned to Richard what Pema said about understanding life…if we accept life on life’s terms, what is there to get upset about? If we KNOW people may not show up, then why get upset? This was another huge A-ha moment and it was a LOT easier to just let it all go instead of having that sticky, heavy feeling of ‘oh great, woes me, another disappointment, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.’
I was right about feeling drained, I did end up in bed ALL day yesterday with a migraine. So, note to self: This is a lesson learned without a negative outcome, and in fact, it was a good test to see where my heart and spirit were…
…and, I learned, it wasn’t really even that big of a deal in the big picture of life! 🙂