Back to the Beginning: Broken and Touched by a Different Kind of Healing (posted May 14, 2009)


Today has been a tough one emotionally, not surprisingly following difficult news. I have to share something incredible.

In addition to the tough news from the Social Worker yesterday, I received a letter from the at-fault party’s insurance saying my ‘minor’ injuries will be difficult to prove. I was very angry and tired of being railroaded by an insurance company that had once been kind.

At my wit’s end, I went into today’s appointments just barely getting myself there. Deep in thought at the chiropractor’s office when I was called back, the Chiropractic Assistant didn’t lead me to the adjustment table so I thought today was the re-exam. I tried to sit, but went to the window instead.

A rainy day outside, and a rainy day in my heart. So many years of struggling and so bone tired.

The Chiropractor came in and asked about my pain, but it seemed like she knew I needed a safe place to share my heart. She asked if there was anything else going on I’d like to talk about. I almost said no, and then said yes.

I shared my difficult news, she knows about my housing situation as I’d sent them a letter just as an FYI and more so in hopes of being able to encourage others. She asked if I’d spoken with an attorney and I said I’m struggling with a lot of this because I’m not a litigious person.

I told her I don’t know how to face this possibility of losing my home and all this without being broken, and I started to cry. I HATE crying in front of people!

In her gentle, healing words, she said the attorneys I’ve consulted with she continues to be impressed by, and the one thing they’re concerned with, is recovery. Ah, what a nice word to hear.

She said insurance companies do that, don’t take the letter to heart, if I have, she encouraged me to let it go.

She shared that when patients mention the word ‘stiffness’ as I had about my body pain, that always makes her think of the word stress. The body is needing healing…

I said there’s so much going on right now and it seems like I just can’t get the rest I need.

She encouraged me to take care of myself, it’s not being litigious to inquire of an attorney, or get an attorney, that is taking care of myself, and that low-impact injuries are common and their letter doesn’t change what I’m experiencing.

Having an attorney can be helpful for some folks because they do a lot of the paperwork I would be doing or am trying to do, and I can focus on healing. Wow, that sounds lovely! And, maybe they can offer some help or assistance with the disability claim as well.

Her support made my day, what an awesome thing, to be in the presence of folks who are not afraid of the human condition, disability, feelings, etc. Talk about healing! It’s like a spring rain in the desert.

As I went to leave, I’d requested my records a couple weeks ago (I think). They apologized for not getting information to me about how much it would cost.

The doctor’s husband does a lot of their book work and was the one to tell me it would usually cost $100 but considering my circumstances they were only charging me for their cost which is $35. I asked if they were serious and he said yes.

I was overwhelmed! I’d expected a couple hundred dollars and had brought the checkbook for my savings account. Words can’t express my gratitude and how much my heart was touched, I really wanted to cry then!!

I went out to my car and let myself cry a little more before I left the parking lot.

There is a different type of healing going on there, they heal broken hearts and spirits too. To be in a place of such great need, to have folks grant such loving kindness is beyond words.

Healing broken spirits is the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.

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About Resilient Heart

TBI x3, that's me! If you had a Traumatic Brain Injury (or Injuries!) and knew you might not remember dates, events, people, etc., would you live each day differently? Would you give more, forgive more, heal more? I am. The statistics for me developing Dementia or Alzheimer's is a high possibility - one, because of the TBIs, and two - because I'm genetically predisposed. Come with me as this present moment is all we know we have... Wishing you all the best - today & always. Blessings, Love & Peace, RH
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